Archives from January, 2011

Jan 11

Today in Hystery January 28th

“On this day in 1860, Britain formally returned the Mosquito Coast to Nicaragua. Britain also gave them back Lake Piranha, Leech Creek and Tarantula Valley.”

Jan 11

Today in Hystery January 27th

“On this day in 1870, the first sorority in America started up in Indiana. It was the Kappa Alpha Theta. Because they use Greek letters, these societies are modeled after the Greeks. So far, I haven’t noticed any Geek societies starting up, although, God knows, college campuses are full of them. I guess if they started a Geek society, it would be called “Betta Hacka Database”.

Jan 11

Today in Hystery January 26th

“If your birthday is January 26th, you share it with “The Great One”, hockey’s greatest player, Wayne Gretzky, who was born on this day in 1961. You may mock the title, but in Canada, slandering Wayne Gretzky is the only offense left on the books where the death penalty still applies. One bad word and you will be executed by Cement Head Semenko with a large fist to the face.”

Jan 11

Today in Hystery January 25th

“If your birthday is January 25th, you share it with Scotland’s greatest poet, Robert Burns, who was born on this day in 1759. His birthday is celebrated every year on this date by people gathering together, getting hammered on Scotch and eating a sheep’s stomach. The evening of the 25th is absolutely fabulous. The morning of the 26th…not so fabulous.”